Between 1985 and 2000, when the divorce rate in Japan nearly doubled amongst couples married for 20 years, experts blamed “Retired husband syndrome.† Sounds like the punch line to a bad joke.
But as divorce rates rise, researchers throughout the world are determined to find the cause. Like in the United States where it is widely reported that over half of marriages end in divorce. “For better or worse” doesn’t always apply.
Divorce can be expensive, financially devastating even, and many site factors such as: lack of education, young age, and lower incomes.
But Melissa Orlov, author of the book “The A.D.H.D. Effect on Marriage,â€published in September of 2010 has another theory. The book claims to be an invaluable resource for couples in which one of the partners suffers from Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. It guides couples in troubled marriages towards an understanding and appreciation for the struggles and triumphs of a relationship affected by ADHD.
According to the NY Times, “In a marriage, the common symptoms of the disorder — distraction, disorganization, forgetfulness — can easily be misinterpreted as laziness, selfishness, and a lack of love and concern.â€
While it may sound like yet another excuse, research suggests that at least 4% of adults suffer from ADHD, and the toll it can take on a marriage is very real. When one partner is consistently distracted, it becomes a constant and grating source of contention. Does your husband forget to take the trash out? Forget to pick the children up from school? Never pay bills on time? While these inconsistencies are hardly limited to marriages where one partner has ADHD, research suggests that these adults are twice as likely to get divorced.
If you or your partner is suffering from ADHD, check out www.adhdmarriage.com. It might help you peg the problem before it is too late.